On Sunday, the conference was officially over and my flight home didn’t leave until 7:30 pm. All alone in New York with a day to myself? What a lucky girl!

WARNING: photo-heavy post ahead! Go get yourself a cherry-yuzu soda or something while you wait for the photos to download. (This joke will make sense later in the post. It won’t be any funnier though.)

I loaded my iPhone up with a list of stores I wanted to visit and headed to SoHo to do some shopping.

First stop: Pearl River Market!

The Pearl River Market is three floors of bright colors and pure inspiration.

It’s jam-packed with imported Asian goodies and everywhere you look there are bright colors. Oh! The colors!

Paper umbrellas small and large, Japanese snacks, silk lamps, clothes, bags. It’s all so delicious!

I bought some of these butterflies to hang in our bedroom:

I also bought one of these beckoning cats. I’ve wanted one for years.

I spent over an hour exploring the Pearl River Market and I could have probably stayed another two hours.

My next stop was Muji. Muji is a Japanese store, but it’s the complete opposite of Pearl River. Where Pearl River is all bright colors and chaos, Muji is soothing neutrals and strict order. The two stores couldn’t be more different if the two owners coordinated.

I wanted to buy everything in the store to bring order and calm to my life, but I settled for some city stencils and a shrink wrapped scarf (the kids were amazed when I unwrapped it at home).

Next stop: Purl Soho! I’ve been reading Purl’s excellent craft blog, The Purl Bee for quite a while now and I couldn’t wait to see their store full of luscious yarns and fabric in person. Visually the store did not disappoint:

The wall of Liberty of London fabric samples was gorgeous. I had planned to buy some fat quarters but apparently I’ve never really looked into how much they cost because I was stunned by the prices. When I picked up a small bundle of fat quarters I thought the $95 price on the tag must have been a misprint but then I discovered that the fabric on the bolts was running around $35/yard and I realized that it’s just really frickin’ expensive fabric. I decided to by-pass that particular purchase.

Somehow I resisted this rainbow of wool felt, but I did end up buying a book about felt food written in Japanese. The pictorial instructions look pretty good, but we’ll just have to see how it goes when I sit down to try it!

After all that shopping and eye candy, I was ready for some lunch. I logged onto Yelp! to investigate restaurants in the area and decided to treat myself to a fancy meal at Mercer Kitchen. I didn’t realize it until after I was seated but Mercer Kitchen is one of Jean-Georges Vongerichten’s restaurants. As a celebrity chef stalker, I was excited to finally taste some of his food.

I started off with a salad of roasted red, yellow and white beets with big knobs of goat cheese. It was dressed in simple vinaigrette and had some kind of micro-greens scattered on top. It was very simple, but the flavors are some of my favorites and the ingredients were top-notch. Delicious!

To drink, I ordered the house-made cherry-yuzu soda. Wasn’t it a pretty color? If you’re wondering what yuzu is, it’s an Asian citrus fruit about the size of a small grapefruit. (I had to look it up.) It should not be confused with a yakuza which is a Japanese gangster.

My whole meal at Mercer Kitchen was great — the best of the many delicious things I ate in New York — but the entree was what really knocked it out of the park. I had sea scallops with pea greens ravioli in a bacon vinaigrette. The ravioli were not what I expected. I misread the menu when I ordered and I thought I was getting ravioli with a pea puree inside (have you been watching Top Chef? Are you sick of them saying “pea puree” a million times per episode?) but I was pleasantly surprised by what actually came. The greens inside the ravioli had a nice herbaceous flavor and they cut the richness of the scallop and bacon flavor perfectly. So, so delicious!

OK, the last thing I want to show you from Mercer Kitchen is the bathroom! There was a big skylight in there along with white-washed bricks and this cool arched door. When I noticed that it was devoid of any plastic toys it became clear that it was nicer than any room in my whole house and I decided I wanted to move in. Is that weird?

After my lunch, I headed back to the hotel. It was too early for me to go to the airport, but I didn’t want to just sit around in the lobby, so I went over to Central Park to relax for a while. I walked around a little at first and admired the views of the tall buildings rising up over the trees.

Then I parked it on the ground by a pond and watched the ducks. There were people everywhere and birds kept flying so close to my head that the back-draft ruffled my hair. After a few minutes a mom and a little girl around Augie’s age sat down next to me. The toddler was intent on petting a duck and her mom and I started commiserating about how hard it is to keep two-year-olds out of ponds. And that’s when I realized that really, it was time for me to come home to my boys.

New York — I’m smitten. I’ll be back as soon as I can!

I’ve already filled you in on the BlogHer ‘10 conference-y parts of my trip to New York, now it’s time to hear the rest of the story!

I got to the Oakland airport to fly to New York way too early. This was the first time I’ve flown without kids in years and I forgot how much less complicated everything is when you’re an adult traveling alone. Check-in at the airport goes quickly. Security goes lightning fast. Even buying a coffee and a magazine is easier.

At the gate, I met up with Lisa from Help a Mother Out (though she wisely arrived more than an hour after I did). We knew we were on the same flight so that part wasn’t a surprise, but we were psyched to find out we were sitting right next to each other on the plane. Good omen!

After flying by myself with both kids just a few weeks ago, the flight to New York was like a relaxing trip to the spa. I had time to read magazines, play games on my iPhone, goof around with photos on my laptop and even draw a mediocre picture of my pencil case.

And the best part was that I had multiple drinks on my tray table with no fear that they were going to get dumped on my lap. Very soothing.

Lisa and I shared a cab to the hotel and I oooooh-ed and ahhhh-ed over the bridges and the tall buildings the whole way there. You’d think after living in San Francisco for 20 years I would be immune to the effects of the the big city, but compared to New York, the Bay Area feels like a quaint little town.

When I checked into the Hilton, I was pleased to find that I was up on the 32nd floor. This was my view:

And this is what I saw when I looked down. If you look in the lower right corner, you’ll see a shwarma stand with a line of people queuing up for sandwiches. This stand is considered to be one of the best in all of New York, but unfortunately I never managed to get a plate of take-out while I was visiting.

After settling into our rooms, Lisa and I met up again to wander around the city a little and dig up some dinner. We were pleased to find that the Carnegie Deli was just a couple blocks away. We settled into our table and I was pleased to see we were seated next to Big Pussy:

After eyeing the plates on the tables adjacent to ours, we decided we’d better split a sandwich. The people to our left had plates with huge, delicious looking Reubens piled on them. Though they looked fantastic, neither of us thought it was possible to make a dent in one by ourselves. It wasn’t until we’d ordered one to split — along with a side of fries — that we found out they had were eating one sandwich divided into two servings! Yowza! Here’s a picture of our sandwich before we cut it up. Needless to say, we didn’t even come close to finishing it.

When I got back to my room after dinner the view out my window had transformed into this loveliness!

I spent all of the next day at the BlogHer conference, but in the evening Lisa and I met up again for dinner. We decided to walk by the park and just eat at whichever restaurant we passed that looked good. The park was lovely in the twilight:

And even the entrance to the subway was picturesque:

When we passed by the Plaza, we decided we needed to go in and check it out. So pretty!

We ended up eating a wonderful meal at a French bistro called Le Bonne Soupe. I didn’t take any pictures of my food, but I had a prix fixe menu with salad, mulligatawny soup, bread, creme caramel and a glass of wine. The food was yummy and the cozy atmosphere  of the restaurant was the perfect antidote to the overwhelm I was feeling from the conference and New York in general.

After dinner, I met up with Whitney and Heather and we finished the evening with hot chocolate and blog talk.

The next day was more conferencey goodness. Keynote, sessions, expo hall, more sessions. Then it was off to dinner at The Aspen Social Club with old friends and new.

Dinner was fine, but the conversation was better. After we ate, we hit the official parties in the hotel.

Next…Shopping and relaxing in SoHo!

I’m back from BlogHer ‘10, the humongous blogging conference that took place last weekend in NYC. It was my first time in New York since my high school trip 20 years ago and I absolutely loved visiting the city as an adult. As far as the conference itself went…well…it wasn’t exactly what I expected.

So what did I expect? Hmmmm…good question. And I’m not exactly sure what the answer is.

The BlogHer conference was unlike any conference I’ve ever attended. It’s this really weird mix of professional, social and consumer elements and even now, four days after I’ve returned home, I’m not sure what to make of it. I mostly went to the conference for professional reasons — I’m trying to drum up freelance writing projects and I’m also looking into the best ways to grow my blog and make some money from it. But I also went to New York planning to spend time with friends and hopefully meet some new people. My experiences were all over the map, so I thought I’d just talk a little bit about what I thought was really good and what I thought was not-so-good.

The Good

The Sessions

I attended all or part of seven different sessions in a variety of tracks (I sat through the beginning of two then moved on to others when I realized they weren’t for me). Some of the sessions were really great and I learned at least a few things from every one I attended. I particularly liked the Family Foodies session with Stephania from City Mama, Danielle from Foodmomiac and Sarah from Sarah’s Cucina Bella. They — along with the audience — offered lots of great suggestions for feeding kids and I came away with several new ideas that I’d like to try with my own family. I also really enjoyed Where’s the Line or the Lie: Storytelling, Memoir and Poetic License with BlogHer’s Jory Des Jardins, Jenny Lawson from The Bloggess and Julie Marsh from The Mom Slant. Honestly, I just went to this session because I wanted to see what The Bloggess was like in real life and she didn’t disappoint. She’s very, very funny and hearing her speak is just like reading her blog. And as someone who puts herself and her family out there on the web, I thought the discussion of privacy was interesting. Finally, I felt that the Little Fish in a Big Pond: Understanding, Accepting, and Loving Your Small Blog session was well worth my time. Unlike many of the people who commented in the session, I am trying to grow my blog audience, but a lot of points people made about staying true to yourself, your writing and your interests really resonated with me.

The People

Lisa (Help a Mother Out), Katherine (Dirt to Dish), Asha (ParentHacks), Whitney (Rookie Moms), Alma (Marketing Mommy), surprised Heather (Rookie Moms) and Meagan (The Happiest Mom) at dinner.

I met so many wonderful people while I was at BlogHer that there’s no way I can cover all of them. Some were people whose blogs I’ve read and admired for a long time. Others were people whose blogs were completely unfamiliar to me but who I will definitely be reading from now on. And I also got to spend time with people who’ve I’ve known in real life for a while now (special shout out to the Rookie Moms and my NY dinner buddy Lisa from Help a Mother Out).

The Keynotes

I attended two of the three keynotes: The International Activist Blogger Scholarship Recipients and BlogHer Voices of the Year. Both were inspiring in their own way. The International Activists were four women who blog with the specific intention of changing their countries and righting injustices in the world. They give voice to many woman via their blogs who normally wouldn’t have an outlet to speak  and they risk their lives and freedom to do it. Listening to them made me so glad that the internet exists and gives so many people a megaphone to get their messages out. The Voices of the Year presentation featured 15 bloggers who read their very best posts. Some made me laugh and many made me cry.

The Public Parties

Heather tries to eat the unicorn cake. No, Heather! Don’t!

I didn’t get to as many of the official parties as I’d hoped to, but I did attend Sparklecorn for awhile and spent a couple of hours at the CheeseburgHer party. Both were crazy and fun. The cake at Sparkelcorn was to die for and I had a lovely time dancing on a giant Cheeseburger bed with Heather and Alma at CheeseburgHer.

The Stuff

This is where the weird bits of consumerism come in. BlogHer is heavily subsidized by corporate sponsors and attendees get a lot of swag. The people who attend the conference tend to be the people who do the vast majority of purchasing in this country — let alone the fact that they all post their opinions of pretty much everything they encounter on the internet — and the companies who sponsor BlogHer are well aware of that. I was pretty choosy about what I brought home with me and I recycled quite a bit of stuff at the conference and I still ended up filling a large duffel bag with stuff. I particularly liked the Jimmy Dean alarm clock, the electric toothbrush and the Weebles, which sent me right down memory lane. There were also a lot of free samples in the expo hall, along with a certain amount of dreck. One of the most memorable moments of the weekend was watching a friend take a bite out of a sausage skewered onto a stick and then dipped in pancake batter. She ate it thinking it was a corn dog, and when she put it in her mouth a look of horror immediately crossed her face and she hastily spit it out into  the garbage can next to her. The stunned guy who gave her the sample said, “I can’t believe you just did that in front of me!” Awesome.

The Food

There were a lot of complaints about the food at BlogHer last year, and the organizers obviously took them to heart becaust the food this year was very good. There were healthy choices with lots of fresh fruit, grilled veggies, and fantastic salads at every meal. Considering they were serving over 2000 people per meal, I think that was pretty impressive!

The Not-As-Good

The Sessions

So like I said, many of the sessions were good, but I was a little disappointed with them over all. Maybe it was the specific sessions I chose, but I felt like a lot of them didn’t have much to do with blogging. They were interesting and all, but I had hoped to leave New York with lots of new ideas for improving my blog and I think I only came away with a few ideas.

The other thing I found surprising was that no one had slides! Every room had a huge screen and a projector, but they just sat there unused. Most of the sessions I attended were panels and I realize that the informal nature of  that format doesn’t always lend itself to a structured presentation but some of the topics that were discussed would have really benefited from having visuals. For example, I think the session about statistics  would have been much better if the speakers had shown screen shots of Google Analytics as they explained its various features. At the very least, it would have been helpful if every session had a slide up on the screen listing out the name of the panel and the presenters, their blog URLs and Twitter handles. I found I had to really dig around to get this information and I would have liked to have had it right there in front of me.

The Private Parties

The Mario pedicabs that I didn’t get to go in.

I wasn’t going to comment on this, but I really feel like I have to. There are a lot of invitation-only parties at BlogHer. Many of them are thrown by big brands and they involve some or all of the following:

1. Free drinks.
2. Boring pitches for boring products.
3. Product samples that are given out in hopes that you will write about said product on your blog.
4. Totally awesome experiences that you would probably never get to have in your normal life when your job is taking care of children who scream a lot.

I was invited to none of the private parties. This was my first year attending BlogHer and I’m a small blogger, so I didn’t have any expectation that I would get any invites, but the fact is that it sucks not to be invited to things. It sucks when you’re in jr. high and it sucks when you’re at BlogHer. It’s not that I wanted big swag or to sit through boring product pitches, but when everyone around you is hopping into a pedicab driven by Super Mario or getting tours of the Martha Stewart Omnimedia headquarters and you’re just trying to find someone to eat dinner with it kind of makes you feel like crap. Also, I very much like free drinks.

The Fashion Show

The blog posts and Twitter messages about what to wear to BlogHer before the event are out of control. It seems like that (along with the party chatter and the swag chatter) is all anyone talks about! Maybe it’s the women’s college graduate in me — or maybe it’s because I wear jeans and a t-shirt every day — but I found it stressful and weird.

The Elevators

Oh my God! The elevators at the Hilton were so freaking slow and packed like sardines. I waited for an elevator for over half an hour more than once. Normally I’d just take the stairs, but my room was on the 32nd floor so that wasn’t really an option for me.

So there you go. I’m still kind of mulling it over in my head, but mostly I think it was a good experience. I’ll talk more about my non-BlogHer New Yorking in the next few days!

We all woke up crabby today. The grown-ups woke up crabby. The kids woke up crabby. It’s raining. There is a kitchen that needs cleaning, laundry that needs folding, and the kids expect to be fed for some reason. I decided I needed a little influx of pure fantasy to cheer myself up, so in no particular order, here’s what I wish I was doing today:

• napping
• finishing my book (The Butcher and the Vegetarian)
• getting a massage
• eating a donut (this fake donut — the only one in the house — isn’t cutting it)
• napping with my kids
• reading this book so I can learn about all the cool features on my new camera
• picking a sun-warmed tomato off a plant in the backyard and eating for lunch
• watching whales leap out of the ocean in Hawaii

What do you wish you were doing today? Brighten up my dreary Friday!

To say that I have mixed feelings about being a stay-at-home-mom might just be the understatement of the century.

When I went out on maternity leave after Augie’s birth, I started toying with the idea of quitting my job to stay home with the kids. And then when I was laid off from my job the decision was made for me. I’m not going to get into all the hows and whys of my lay-off, but I will say that there were several logical reasons why I was chosen to be the person in my department who was let go. But try as I might to not take it personally, it’s pretty hard to be laid off from a job and not take it personally. Unless entire divisions get the axe, there is always someone choosing who will or won’t get to keep their jobs and if you’re one of the ones who’s chosen to be let go you can’t help but think now and then, “I’m less valuable.” So, I’m just going to put it out there and say that this mindset is what set the tone for the start of my career as a stay at home mom.

I never thought that being a stay at home parent would be easy. I’ve had two maternity leaves and I watched the challenges that Zach faced every day in his three and a half years staying home with Wyatt, so I had a pretty good idea what to expect. But even so I had all these idyllic visions in my head about how it was going to be. I would take serene trips to the library with the kids and we’d all cuddle up on the couch afterward reading books together. Augie and I would enroll in Mommy and Me classes and when we picked Wyatt up from school we would all play together in the back yard until it was time to go inside and eat a nutritious dinner with Zach. And the house! The house would be so clean and neat!

You see — I was going to be different from all the stay at home parents who struggle with the job. I am very organized and efficient and I’ve kicked ass at every single job I’ve ever had. I can get all the hard stuff done while the baby naps.

Oh.

Wait a minute.

Maybe I’m not so different from all those other parents.

Let’s start with the house-cleaning. The fact is, I’m not a very good housekeeper and I really don’t enjoy it at all. I enjoy having a clean house, of course, but somehow my house is messier now than it was when I was working full time. Our house is always a total disaster. There are toys everywhere. There are piles of books and magazines and mail on every flat surface. There is never a time — ever — when some room in our house does not desperately need to be picked up. I’m going to be very brave here and show you a picture of what our living room looked like today, March 3, at 2:07 p.m.:

I will never summon the courage to take a similar picture of our office. It is way, way more embarrassing than this photo.

And the laundry. Oh, dear God — the laundry! It is just out of control. I fantasize about donating all our clothes to the Goodwill so I don’t have to do another stinking load of wash.

I do OK on dinner, I guess. Mostly. And I’m super good at lunches (if I may toot my own horn).

But most days when I walk into the house, I want to immediately walk out again to find someplace — any place — else to be so that I don’t have to engage in the endless cycle of loading the dishwasher, picking up toys, starting the laundry, and on and on ad nauseum.

I also didn’t anticipate how different the boys’ schedules would be. Between Wyatt’s school drop-off and pick-up, Augie’s naps and the necessity of feeding everyone, there really isn’t much time for fun family activities in a day.

And then there’s the boredom. I love spending time with Augie, but at 18 months, he’s not much of a conversationalist. And the five year old is an excellent communicator, but all he wants to talk about is Batman. It would be nice if he could read the latest book of Sedaris essays so we could discuss it over chai, but it’s just not happening. It’s been really hard to move from a challenging job that required my full brain capacity, sophisticated problem-solving skills, and constant interaction with lots of different people to a job that requires that I wash dishes, change diapers and point to objects and say what color they are in a clear and deliberate voice. Let’s face it – the work of a stay at home mom, isn’t exactly scintillating. It’s very important and it’s challenging in its own way, but a whole heck of a lot of it is boring, repetitive drudgery.

There are incredible sweet spots of course. I missed much of Wyatt’s first year because I was working full time, so I have treasured being there for all of August’s milestones. When I’m feeling down, I can almost always coax a giggle or two out of my kids to cheer me up. And I love being there to pick Wyatt up from school every day. I love how his face lights up when he spots me among the parents milling around outside the Kindergarten door.

Then there are other benefits that I never would have anticipated.  I’ve wanted to be a writer since I was a little girl and now, for the first time since I graduated from college I have a little bit of time to actually do it. And there’s this crazy bento thing in my life that I never would have seen coming in a million years. And I actually manage to do some crafting now and then which is also pretty satisfying.

So yeah – it’s a mixed bag. Some days I love it. Some days I don’t. But right now, it’s who I am and what I do.

I thought I’d give monthly updates on the goals I’ve set for myself for 2010. I’m happy to report that I’ve completed several items on my list, started a few more and that I’ve laid the groundwork for some others.

Completed:

• #14 Finish my project 365 blog posts. Ta da! I wrapped up the year with my final post earlier this month.
• #15 Finish the fingerless mitts I started before Christmas. I finished these blue arm warmers this month too.
• #67 Start Weight Watchers again. I’m all signed up and I’ve been going to meetings but I’ll admit I’ve been lacking the motivation to really make the program work for me. Baby steps.

In Progress:

• #3 Find five reliable, healthy, delicious soup recipes. I’ve tried several soup recipes this month, but I’ve only found one so far that I plan to make again. A White Chicken Chili recipe in a Prevention magazine Slow Cooker cookbook.
• #11 Assemble Project 365 scrapbook. I’ve started working on my 2009 Project 365 scrapbook. I’ll post more on this later when I’m a little farther along.
• #12 Do another photo-a-day project. Another one I’ve started — I’ve been posting my photos as in weekly posts again.
• #19 Make a softie for my niece-to-be. My sister-in-law is due with her first baby in just two weeks! I’ve got a welcome home project under way and I’m hoping Erin can keep that baby inside long enough for me to finish it. (Sorry, Erin — I know you’re ready to burst, but I have just a leeetle more sewing to do….)
• #29 Add five new foods to Wyatt’s eating repertoire. Big progress here! Wyatt has been very good about trying new foods in the past few months and he’s started enjoying a few new things if they’re prepared just right. So far he’s partially changed his mind about snap peas, ranch dressing and chicken! I’m not saying these are officially foods he’ll eat yet, but it’s a start.
• #55 Find my copy of Wreck This Journal and wreck it. I found the book buried in a pile on my desk and I’ve done a few pages in it.

Upcoming:

• #21 Make at least 30 scrapbook layouts. I plan to make significant progress on this one in February! I signed up for Lain Ehmann’s Layout a Day Challenge (also referred to as “LOAD”) and while I’m not sure if I can actually make 28 layouts next month, I’m expecting to get quite a few done.
• #25 Make some felt flower barrettes. I’m hoping to make one of these beautiful rose barrettes this month too.
• # 39 Take Wyatt to the King Tut exhibit. We’re planning to do this the week of the 15th when Wyatt is off school.